“Ex-gays” and their superiority complex

I’ve been noticing a pattern since I started to read about these people who call themselves ‘ex-gay.’  They claim that their drug use, their multiple sex partners, and all their other problems are purely because they were gay.  For me that make no sense, except that it does give them an excuse for their own behavior.  Why is it that these people can’t take responsibility for their own decisions–and when I say that I mean that they were not FORCED to take drugs, they weren’t FORCED to have multiple sex partners and so on.  They made their decisions and now apparently the guilt has set in.  Now they blame all their own decisions on the fact that they were gay.  Now that they are straight, they no longer do these things, as if being gay is somehow equivalent to drug use and having multiple partners.  Give me a break.

I have also noticed too that they must feel like they have to bash the gay community to death.  Why would they do this?  A good guess is that it makes them feel superior.  It might also be a mask that they have to wear to make sure that everyone knows they are no longer gay.  It reminds me of the same mask that Haggard wore when he lied to the entire country that he had never met his gay prostitute… 

I don’t care if people think they can change from gay to straight.  I do care when these very same people come out fighting as if the gay community was evil itself.  Their problem is that they made bad decisions at some point in their life and instead of taking responsibility for their own actions, they blame being gay. 

One ex-gay has taken it upon himself to reveal the real problems in the homosexual lifestyle.  How does he do this?  Here is one entry in a list of ‘problems’:


Bug Chasers: This is a huge problem in the Homosexual lifestyle, these are in general men who feel they will ultimately get HIV, so they choose to find someone who is infected to give them HIV, it’s a very destructive behavior. Most Homosexual activists will deny this happens, however many Gay Publications have talked about this, and some refer to it as a Epidemic. In fact Showtime’s ‘Queer as Folk’, had a episode on this very thing, three years ago, this is nothing new, but it is something that is trying to be kept secret.

A huge problem?  Lie #1.  Peter LaBarbera posted an article from 2003 Rolling Stone magazine about something called Bug Chasers.  These are gay men who apparently desire to become HIV positive.  It is so disgusting that it is hard to believe and I really believe that these people who want to do this are mentally ill, just like people who want to kill themselves in other ways.  The article claims that 25% of all new HIV infections are from ‘bug chasers’ but as I pointed out at Chesterstreet today and what Joe Brummer has pointed out, this is a lie and the person who was quoted as saying this has come out and said it was a lie. 

But ‘ex-gay’ now is saying it is a huge problem.  He also claims that ‘some’ say it is an epidemic. Whenever I see ‘some people say’ I automatically think that no one has said this–this is just something that someone made up.  Show me the sources and show me the facts. 

People in the gay community are trying to keep it a secret?  Lie #2.  No one is trying to keep this secret.  What a joke.  And the immaturity of this ‘ex-gay’ can be seen in his using ‘Queer as Folk’ as an example.  So putting it on Queer as Folk is the way that the gay community is trying to keep it a secret?  What? 

Since this ‘ex-gay’ has said his blog is going to be centered around Christ, here is a quote from the Old Testament he obviously missed (it is becoming my favorite to use against people who so obviously lie):

Prov. 6:16ff:

16There are six things that the LORD hates,
   seven that are an abomination to him:
17haughty eyes, a lying tongue,
   and hands that shed innocent blood,
18a heart that devises wicked plans,
feet that make haste to run to evil,
19a false witness who breathes out lies,
   and one who sows discord among brothers.

You can go to his blog to read the rest of his ‘truth.’  One of the most disturbing things I read from his list is this (my bold):


Pedophilia: While this is not as widespread as some of the other issues in the Homosexual community, it is a problem. Myself and Justin know of at least one guy who claimed to be gay, who actively pursued young boys, went to Pedophile websites, and was even engaging in sex with his own nephew. This is a problem that activists are throwing under the rug and not dealing with it, ignoring a problem once again does not make it go away.

My God–who is ‘throwing this under a rug’?!!  Isn’t it against the law to be protecting pedophiles?

Here is my response to his entire post:

Robert, you are doing it again. You state that ‘bug-chasing’ is "a huge problem in the Homosexual lifestyle" but you know that is a lie and who has called it an epidemic? No one I know has denied that it happens and if you are referring to me, then you are lying again. Why you are doing this self-destructive behavior (lying) is a mystery to me.

You also know that drug use is a problem in the straight community, of which you are now a part of. Why don’t you blog about that? All of your points I could easily turn around and write about them as if they were a straight problem, but that would be a bit childish…Maybe you would do a bit more good concentrating on the straight population, since they are such a huge majority.

And speaking of pedophilia and the fact that you know someone who has molested a child–you need to go to the police. If you do not, then you are part of the problem that you think gays and lesbians are a part of. Who exactly is ‘throwing this under a rug"?

So your statistics are not scientific, then they are not statistics–they are your own opinions. There is a big difference. If you think there is some truth to be brought to the forefront then be my guest. I will be the first to read it. BUT you better be telling the truth and know what you are talking about. Queer as Folk is not something that is a source for gay and lesbian information, any more than "Friends" or "Dirt" is about straight lives.

I do wish you well in your switch from gay to straight (really). But as you will soon read from Joe Brummer, you have gone from being the oppressed to being an oppressor. That can’t feel very good and it is also a mystery to me why you need to feel superior.

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